Clouded Dreams

The more I learn about literal nighttime dreams, the more I realize that my choice of dream for One Word 2013 was way more involved than I expected.

According to our memories, some people never dream during sleep at all.  Others only dream occasionally.  Still others, like me, dream several dreams most nights.

According to science, everyone dreams numerous dreams every single night.  Some people just remember them better than others, and even that is often linked to what sleep cycle a person wakes or is woken during.

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Have you ever had one of those dreams where you have an idea of what's going on, but your periphery is dark and everything you can see is foggy or dim - no matter how hard you rub your eyes or how many times you blink, you still feel like you're surrounded by a cloud of smoke.  Only once you've woken up do you realize it was a dream and it all makes sense.  Even then, you don't always really know what was going on in the dream.

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Those are perfect descriptions for how I've felt the past couple of months.  I know God has dreams for me - not just the big, vague future idea of missionary, but specifics.  He has a college picked out for me, and He knows exactly which classes and teachers and roommates and dorm rooms and prayer groups and weekend plans and part-time jobs and break time plans I'll have.  He not only knows what country He'll send me to, but what part of that country and what village or town or city there and what my home will be and the names, birthdays, favorite colors, first words, and eye colors of every child I will ever teach.

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He has all these marvelous, specific, wonderful, amazing, breathtaking dreams for me.  The only part I know right now is that I have to narrow down my college list, apply to so many schools, and pray I end up at the right one.

Someday, eventually, I'll be that amazing teacher living a mindblowingly blessed life in the place God's chosen.  Right now, making it through high school is already more than I have the focus and energy for.

God has hundreds of dreams for every one of us on earth - but those who are bold and trusting enough to accept theirs only get to live them one at a time.

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One day.  One step.  One dream.

Only once we've passed through to the other side and woken up does any of it make sense - and even then, sometimes all we've got is another hazy cloud to walk through and our faith to pull us through it.

I'm participating in Melanie's Monthly One Word Linkup Party.  Join us!